Saturday, September 23, 2006

Drink Milk, Because Juice Will Kill You

Iowa-Illinois this morning, and the first career start for Juice Williams. I always thought she was a country singer in the 80s. Turns out he is a quarterback from Chicago. Tough way to start your career, against the #14 team in the country and with a coach who may or may not possess a complete human brain.
Believe it or not, this is the head coach of a Division I football team

I'm typing this during the first quarter, and this Iowa team continues to terrify me. If we started any slower, we'd be running backwards. Stupid penalties, poor tackling, bad blocking up front, the list goes on. The same thing happened against the Cuse and ISU. Needless to say, it's time to start showing up in the first quarter.

UPDATE: Iowa still hasn't woken up, and Juice is 0 for 5 throwing the ball. The good news for Illinois, however, is that someone discovered former Giants slugger Kevin Mitchell and put him in their defensive backfield. In case you've forgotten about the 1989 National League MVP, he's already picked up a sack.

UPDATE ON THE UPDATE: Kevin Mitchell's page on is hosted by Dwight Gooden's Cat. The cat's quote: "Steak knives and crack don't mix I found out the hard way." Here's the story. Allegedly.

UPDATE: Has there ever been a worse team that talks as much smack as Illinois? They've lost 11 games in a row, and they're acting like the '89 Miami Hurricanes. By the way, it's the end of the first quarter, no score.

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